Bad Agency Deal in France

Being bored out of mind by the nature of my job in Miami and in need of a change of scenery I took a contract (CDI) in Grenoble/Sophia Antipolis, France.

I kept telling my French agency that I need relocation assistance (no, I would not insult their highfalutin selves with a request for reimbursement of relo expenses) by which I meant "help finding a flat to rent" [this can be tricky in France].

Also my contract had some interesting S&S clauses (scummy & scammy):

1. the salary of 55k € was to be paid in 13 1/2 tranches... 12 monthly, 1 extra at X-Mas and 1/2 at the end of the year -- I asked around other recruiters in France and they deemed that "unusual";
2. if I were to quit before hitting X-Mas and end of contract year in their employ I would forfeit the respective tranches(sweet!);
3. altho legislation of France notes that the 25 days of vacation accrue monthly and can be redeemed after the first month they would only pay for them after the second month;
4. CDI employees are entitled to daily 10 € lunch vouchers yet I saw none of that... in a year that adds up to a nice bob!

The net result was that my net salary was 3.3k€/month. Now the French are sticklers for rules & laws -- one such iron rule (but not law!) that I did not find on expat blogs is that one can rent for up to 1/3 of his net income. Paying in advance for one year is forbidden by law -- the poor need protection!

Protip: The probation period is (customarily) 3 months in France during which nobody won't rent to you.

Alas on the Riviera area max 1.1k€/mo won't pay for 3 bedroom places, nevermind I could have paid one year in advance from my lawful gains in Miami. The agency overlords kept feigning deafness until I gave them the customary [for me] Two Weeks Notice.

Then they took notice and offer enthusiastically to "help" (seeing them do that was a John Hurt moment). Help came in the form of sending me to rent a flat in a cheap-ish area with superbad schools... luckily I asked what's what of my French co-workers.

Protip: The agency in concert with my employer ended the probation period then&there so I can rent. Sigh.

Two weeks came and went and Friday I told them "I'm outta here". So the fun began... the CEO of the agency started threatening me with lawyers and demanding money (isn't that called extortion? hmm perhaps not in France).

I did the only reasonable thing... I flew to Belgium the next day to drown my sorrow in Trappist beer. Telling the hapless CEO I'm no longer in France did not go down well ;)

I left word for my friend the CEO that:

If anybody is asking I am in Tijuana making it rain on blow, tequila and mamasitas.

Alas I incurred some buttpain as my fly-by-night airline went bust and I had to fork 500 quid to yet another fly-by-night airline to fly me back home... to Tijuana.

-ulianov